Tuesday, January 19, 2021
Thursday, January 7, 2021
Indoctrination
“Civilization is in a race between education and catastrophe. Let us learn the truth and spread it as far and wide as our circumstances allow. For the truth is the greatest weapon we have.”
― H. G. Wells
In the year 1984, I was in the 5th grade enrolled at J.E. March Elementary School in the northeast corner of the Las Vegas valley. A year later I’d be bussed to the poor side of town for the 6th grade where for the first time I’d hear kids my age openly scream cusswords which was shocking to my ears. For the moment I was tucked into the innocence of Nellis Air Force base schooling as my dad was stationed at there and the school was on base.
Every week, between learning fractions, history, or science, we’d read short stories or chapters from great American authors including Mark Twain, and Jack London. During the course of reading this material our teacher, Mr. Rodgers, lectured about how London and Twain considered themselves Socialists. He went on about how socialists did great things to further equality in our country. He didn’t say much about what they did that was so great but he went out of his way to make a point of emphasizing their positive impact on society at large.
Every few months the class would get a catalog filled with discounted books from a company called the Scholastic Reader. Our parents were encouraged to buy books from the catalog to encourage us to read. We looked forward to seeing the catalog quarterly knowing we were on the cusp of getting presents in the form of books. In addition to the catalog we would occasionally get a newsprint magazine from Scholastic Reader conveniently entitled the Scholastic Reader. Mr. Rodgers would make us read this magazine, which he described as a newspaper for kids, so that we could familiarize ourselves with current events. It was read aloud in class to get us in the habit of reading the newspaper.
I enjoyed the hell out of Mark Twain. He was just the right amount of smart ass. And Jack London was a dazzling storyteller who made adventure feel within reach. After learning both these guys were socialists I wanted to learn more about socialists. I asked the librarian about Socialism and she was surprised at the query from a precocious 5th grader. There were no books about that stuff in our library.
A week after reading excerpts from the book White Fang, we came across a story in Scholastic Reader about recent troubles in Central America. The article detailed the freedom fighters of Nicaragua, the Contras, and their ongoing battle with the selfish, evil, socialist government and how it was important we support these defenders of democracy. So soon after learning about the good socialists it seemed strange how this article would call the socialists out as bad guys. As the last sentence of the article was read aloud I raised my hand. Mr. Rodgers called on me.
I was a well behaved child not predisposed to being difficult. I was naive, but I had no fear in the pursuit of knowledge and saw no wrong in asking questions.
“I thought you said last week that socialists did good things?”
Mr. Rodgers was quite a bit older. Grey. A friendly goofball of a teacher. The best kind of teacher. He could be stern but more often he was trying hard to be funny, to be liked. My favorite kind of teacher. He looked at me slightly confused, searching for an answer.
“Uh- well, that’s a good question. These must be the bad kind of socialist?” He answered awkwardly, signaling that he didn’t really have an acceptable answer and further questions weren’t worth asking.
This short interaction stuck with me throughout the remainder of my school years and followed me into adulthood. Over the years I’d see many different personalities at the head of the class imparting knowledge. As students we were equals but the teacher had the authority. The adults had the answers. As a student of human nature as well as academics I gleaned from a young age that some teachers are better than others. Some people are worthy of trust, some you just humor.
Perhaps the most important lesson school taught me was that no one is a true authority and that we need to hold our authority figures up to criticism and not take their word for the gospel. As it turns out the truth isn’t as black and white as we would hope it to be. The assault on truth isn’t new, but it’s become a large part of modern life. Especially thanks to the fuckin internet.
Scholastic Reader’s newspaper for kids was a favorite of mine. I was just beginning to take an interest in the “News” of the world. I didn’t have opinions concretely formed at the time and I like to think I’m still open to new information and willing to have my world view change if there’s enough evidence to warrant that change. But I consider the source.
There’s no question in my mind this incident with the Reader was blatant propaganda pushing the line the Reagan administration was trying to sell about the evils of socialism and how important it is we support the “democracy loving” rebels known as the Contras. History hasn’t been kind to the legacy of the Contras. There’s plenty of evidence to paint them as bent to the will of the wealthy class in Nicaragua and not as eager for Democracy as we were led to believe. America has egg on it’s face for propping up a group so diametrically opposed to American ideals of truth, justice, and all that other bullshit. It gets way worse when you consider Iran/Contra.
I’ve done a shit ton of google searches to try and track down evidence of the Scholastic Reader to learn more about it’s origins and who was publishing this information to shape the minds of young Americans. I’ve come up empty handed. So I have no evidence regarding their bias other than my own experience.
I had an interaction with a close friend on Fakebook some years ago. Someone I still care about despite his flaws so I won’t mention his name. This particular day he was going on and on about what a great guy Ronald Reagan was and how Ronnie was our last good president. I can’t hide my own bias. I hate fuckin social media. To each his own. But I do see the basis of social media for what it is, the execution and distribution of bullshit opinions. I admit it’s fun to blow smoke, but facts don’t fuckin lie. Actually half the fun is deflating people’s illusions. I wrote a one word response to his proclamations: BULLSHIT.
Tempers flared immediately. I won’t bother repeating the browbeating, and emotional knee jerking that happened because it’s not as entertaining to recall. I brought up how Ronnie was the first modern president to usher in huge tax cuts for the rich, calling it trickle down. In the 30-40 years since there’s zero evidence that shit works and it’s pretty clear it’s destroyed the middle class. Reagan started the war on the middle class. He was the first president to destroy a labor union. (Air Traffic Controllers) Unions have never recovered from his presidency. He sold arms to Iran to fund the Contras. Somehow cocaine was implicated in these same deals, if you look closely enough. The CIA was complicit in introducing Crack on to the streets of America. Into mostly African American neighborhoods. These aren’t conspiracies. They’re proven details from the Reagan administration. Also his movies sucked. He wouldn’t hear it.
At one point I commented “History’s shown the guy to be a complete shit heel.” To which he replied “What history books are you reading? All lies!” That’s where he fucked up. I was alive (if only in high school) while Reagan shit all over America, and it wasn’t something I needed to read in a history book because I was paying attention when it happened. I reminded him how this happened in our lifetime, and he was present when I spray painted “I Shot Reagan” on a wall two blocks from our high school. (Eldorado High, Class of 89) “Forgot where you came from motherfucker?” I wanted to say that to him but it would have destroyed our friendship, although it was clear he had forgotten. Still bringing up that memory from high school placated him. We stopped arguing, we kissed and made up. I didn’t want to stop being friends with the guy, despite his ignorance, so I made sure it was nothing personal. However it’s my guess he still thinks Reagan is worthy of respect.
We’re all entitled to our own opinion but if you’re gonna deny shit that happened in front of your own two eyes- um… I don’t know what to say to that kinda shit. If people are just making shit up then it follows that we’re making a world full of shit and we are all in danger of drowning, not just the stooges easily led astray.
I don’t think I know everything. I’m convinced I don’t know nearly enough. Truth is subjective. But playing games with the truth is no fuckin joke. If you question the holocaust you’re paving the way for the next genocide. If you think slavery happened a long time ago and doesn’t have any bearing on today you are denigrating millions who lost their lives to create what we know as modern America. If you want to act like Reagan was a hero then you’re playing into the hands of people who stand to gain a lot by manipulating you. Reagan didn’t give a shit about you, or democracy, or equality, or any of those sexy concepts.
Can I prove it? No. Just like I can’t prove shit about Scholastic Reader newsprint magazine. There’s nothing on the internet to back up my memories. But I’m still alive. And I remember. When there’s no longer people willing to stand up to “authorities” America will be in some seriously deep shit.
I don’t know how to educated motherfuckers to not be gullible. It’s easy to see how they could be so fooled. There’s millions if not billions of dollars behind the decades long campaign to prop up the rich. They got deep pockets and resources well beyond bleeding heart liberals. The idea that there’s a well funded organization of antifascist villains hell bent on stealing our hard-earned money to socialize medicine is- wait- read that sentence again. Does that shit actually make sense to you? Why are ideas like these being put forth by unpaid obscure motherfuckers like me operating out of my living room while Fox News/Rush Limburger/MisInfo Wars and the like are beamed into millions of homes nightly? If there’s a left wing organization trying to push socialism why won’t they offer me a job? I’d work hard in a job like that and I’m sure I wouldn’t steal from work if I had such a career.
But those good paying jobs destroying the community through socialism are no where to be found posted on craigslist. Instead I do see a daily blast of misinformation that is ruthless to the point of cruelty dredging up ghosts from the cold war to characterize any impulse to socialism as theft to hardworking people of America when the truth is the workers have been robbed from those very same rich fuckos.
Even the tiniest amount of bullshit read by students in a classroom in 1984 is a part of a campaign that’s pretty hard to deny. Some people will say I’m talking conspiracy. These are the same people who easily swallow ideas about a cabal of cannibalistic satanic pedophiles who control the deep socialist state. You tell me who’s the rube?
The Right Wing mouthpiece is now an industry that’s unapologetic in it’s fascist devotion to the ideal of corporate authority, with the power to silence those who question it’s legitimacy. A lifetime of being fed bullshit has made many Americans enjoy the taste of bullshit, enjoy licking the boots of their oppressors. That’s the only justification I can find to explain how dirt poor people are passionately defending billionaires against their own self interest. Motherfuckers are even ok to die for the economy during the pandemic? What the fuck are you talking about?
We’re in a new Gilded Age. If we as a society refuse to acknowledge the needs for social reform and big sweeping checks on unfettered capitalism, then do we not deserve a flood when the dam bursts?
Monday, January 4, 2021
The lost Part-Time Whore song?
I had a dream last night about the rock group I fronted. Some say I was fronting the whole time. They may be right.
The group broke up acrimoniously about 20 years ago with a whimper instead of a bang. I say “about” because we never made it official. I stopped coming to practice and they never called me again. The band had run it’s course and we didn’t really get along to begin with. In fact we had a huge fight during a show we were playing in front of 100 people. By all rights we should have broken up at that show, but we had a few big commitments that forced us to limp along for a few more shows. Also we had just released our full length album so there were hopes that we could unload a few more copies before ditching it. I’ve written about the band before on this blog.
That’s history, but it’s also a part of me. Every few years I have a dream where we get the band back together and play a show at a shitty venue to astounding applause. Then there’s talk of a future. I awaken a bit deflated. Instead, in this dream the band got back together without me. And for some reason they were playing on the David Letterman show. I showed up and the guys looked nonplussed. There was some question as to why I was there. I wondered that myself. I don’t think I performed with them in the dream. In fact we were hanging out backstage and that was the extent of the dream. I awoke again deflated.
I miss the camaraderie that comes with being in a band. The us versus them bond made for some powerful moments in my life. It gave me confidence. It made me proud. It broke my heart more than once. In fact it broke my heart enough I stopped coming by to practice. At that point I had a smoking hot girlfriend so it made it easier to walk away from the drama. I still dream about being a part of a group, working together, making something magic. I've always had a hard time relating to other people, so in a way it was magic that Part-Time Whore was able to exist at all.
The truth is, years after the fact I still yearned to be a part of a gang loudly making a statement, even if that statement was music. Somewhere down the line I’ll reveal embarrassing stories about the Thrash Metal band I fronted in Portland and how they kicked me out telling me I wasn't metal enough (too punk) which prompted me to join a Ska band shortly thereafter. I’m not joking, this was like 2005-06.
On to the original idea for this post. It’s the 20 year anniversary of this song being recorded and released on wax. Yes, this song was pressed on vinyl. I wanted to share the song because I don’t think it got it’s due.
The 90’s was a pretty bad time for music in general in all places but one, the world of Very Small Records. The Bay area was still on fire but it wasn’t because of Lookout Records. That label jumped the shark the day it’s co-founder David Hayes left the building. He went on to start his own label which for my money was the only label worth a shit in that entire decade: Very Small Records. While Lookout putzed around trying to find the next Offspring, Very Small Records put out music from the cream of the underground crop including Econochrist, Jawbreaker, Schlong, Lizards, Nuisance, Sick and Tired, Elmer, 23 More Minutes, Logical Nonsense, Sleep, Pinhead Gunpowder, Grimple, Buzzoven… I could go on.
For any musician paying attention it was a dream to be included on one of Very Small Record’s numerous compilations. They were legendary documents of the underground with hilarious samples between songs, impressive musicianship, clever lyricism and other kooky odds and ends. Part-Time Whore needed to get our shit together to record a song for David Hayes, who also happened to be living in Las Vegas at the time at our drummer’s house. So yeah, we already had an in… But I’m happy to say we had a song on par with Very Small’s aesthetic. Something which was almost as good as the stuff we’d been eating up from all those Very Small releases over the years.
I wrote the lyrics for every song we created, so it fell to me to come up with the goods to fit the theme of the compilation, which happened to be songs about drinking ALCOHOL. Not my strong suit but I was no slouch at being a souse either.
Initially I wanted to call it Bourgeoisie Beer Disasters about the perils of buying good beer and putting it in the fridge while your buddies buy the cheap shit and end up drinking all your good beer before you get through the first bottle. I was a slow drinker, still am, invariably my fancy booshie beers would get consumed before I could get my fill. It was a rarity for any of us to afford good beers back then but when it happened I’d often miss out on a second beer from that skunky German import or Pale Ale from Sierra Nevada. So yeah, it was a social issue for which I had a passion. I planned to steal the graphic from the Dead Kennedys: Plastic Surgery Disasters cover and have the smaller hand holding a Heineken. Classy, eh?
I thought it was a clever idea but I also wanted to add a backwards message to the song which seemed out of place with the booshy beer disaster theme. So instead I wrote a song about Heavy Metal horseshit with numerous references to Satan, drug, drink and southern Nevada. Satan was somehow very popular in the 80’s. I suppose he made a resurgence when Black Metal became hot. On a side note I should add that I didn’t think I could have less respect for Heavy Metal until Black Metal made itself known to me.
Tongue in cheek I wrote about 80’s Satan hysteria, swillin beer, smoking weed, and blowing up cars behind Sunrise Mountain, a clear Southern Nevada reference inspired by the Las Vegas punk rock legend known as Badger who is rumored to have stolen cars and blown them up in the desert.
I also included a reference to huffing Freon, which was a fucked up way of getting high for kids on the East side of Las Vegas in the 80’s. It’s outlandish, insane, and hard for me to believe we did that shit without many casualties. We took self destruction to new heights back then, or we were just desperate and stupid. Anyone with memories of engaging in such idiocy might notice how I added a shit ton of reverb to the line “Freon at wholesale))))))).” I did this because when in the throes of freon huffing many reprobates shared stories about hearing voices drenched in reverb right before passing out and pissing or shitting in their pants. Freon was later made illegal because so many kids died huffing that shit. Also it burned a hole in the ozone layer. Which is also not good.
This song, entitled “Speedcore Never Died It Just Got Faded (A Rock Opera)” got lost in the shuffle. It was the last thing we did as a band before petering out. It’s probably our finest moment in terms of recorded output. It’s certainly Part-Time Whore at our most hardcore sounding. It’s also PTW at our most cinematic. People nowadays listen to music on youtube, so I’ve put it out there for all the world to consume at their leisure. If you like it feel free to download it below.
I’m one of those cliche guys who forever hated hardcore punk following the demise of my own hardcore punk band. Surprised? Most "punk rock" made during this time has not aged well. Part-Time Whore is no different. i wasnt the best singer. More of a ballsy front man than anything. At the time the only bands around were paint by numbers garbage, youth crew bullshit to help teens with self esteem issues so they could be a part of "the crew" (barf), emotional hardcore (emo) for teens with puppy love issues, or straight up shitty metal calling itself Crust for “teens” (usually older d-bags) with drug issues. This was prior to Black Metal becoming a big part of extreme white people music which was more of an inspiration later on in "the scene" and to this day gives me just one more reason not to go to shows anymore. But what do I know? I’m an old ass man.
After I walked away I was no longer contributing to that shit and felt like the music, the culture, the scene, had failed and was no longer relevant. I still feel that way when I see people get excited about that stuff, and it makes me annoyed with it even more, and yet I’m writing about it here today. Oh the irony. I hate to be so judgmental but I expected more from it considering how powerful it was for me for such a long time. But hey, it’s entertainment not revolution. That's a seperate discussion. If you read the lyrics from the PTW LP you might think I was taking shit way too seriously. That observation would have pissed me off back then. I'd agree with it now. And yet it doesn't ease up the amount of disappoinment i still feel towards that "subculture."
The goofy nostalgia of this song was a good way for me to ass out of it. That is until I was asked to be a part of a thrash band years later! I’ll have to share that embarrassment of riches another time.
download the song by clicking here: https://www.mediafire.com/file/w7soksm5ozgeodd/14_Speedcore_Never_Died....mp3/file
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- Chad Simmons
- portland, oregon, United States
- I grew up in Vegas. East side by El Dog. It will always be my hometown for better or worse. Currently living as a labor activist in Portland, Oregon. For better or worse.
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